Im finding it hard to do the whole, reason / season theory. There is a piece of writing that explains how people come in and out of your life. It is helping me deal with things, but from time to time, the feelings overwhelm me and I get upset.
Some 'Friends' who I thought were, have ceased to be. Some have been promoted, and whereas thats great for them, it leaves me feeling like I cant fulfill them anymore. They are better now, they cant really do the same things as they did before, it wouldnt be 'seen' as right. Well, ok then, there you go. Its interesting how the people you help get to the top, forget everything you ahve shared with them, and move on. Ok, if they have, then I will. = SEASON ENDED.
Other 'Friends' have got married and had children. I dont know what thats like yet. They all moved away to be withing a few miles from one another, how nice. Im not bitter, dont get me wrong, I am very happy for all of them, especially as at one time, I knew them when they were unhappy. I held their hands, I supported them.But they are ok now, no need for anything else. Its not the fact that they moved away, or started to do different things. Its the fact that for the past year I have left them countless voicemails and texts to get in touch for a catch up, and they havent returned my calls. Even though I called them time and time again naively with no thought of 'maybe they dont want to be my friend anymore' or 'perhaps they are just busy' . It took my sister to bring me to my senses and reveal to me my dignity. How many times should you call someone for them to ignore you.Ok then. I get the message. SEASON ENDED.
I think in my friendship garden I am 'weeding' phase. It is winter now, and there is nothing much to look at. So therefore I am going to spend time preparing the soil for new friendships. Im going to look after myself and the ones who care about me. I will continue to water those 'lifetime' friendships because they are the perennials. They have proved time and time again that they come back regardless of reasons and seasons. My friendship garden has less than it had before. I wonder what it will look like soon? I am going from one season to another. Summer will be here soon. I wonder what friendships I am planting right now?
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